Before clicking “send”…

Before you click the send button, please put just a little bit of thought into what you have to say. Is it worthwhile? Is it going to get a response (provided you’re looking for a response and I assume you are since you’re also on Plenty of Fish)? Is it well thought out? How will this be received? Would I want to get a message like this?

These few simple questions could have dramatically positive effects on how people respond to you.

Of the last few messages I’ve received on PoF, here’s what I’ve seen (word for word):

“Hi” (x2)

“How are you doing tonight?”

“hello there, how are you doing today besides looking so beautiful?”

(Here’s one of my favourites)

“So long, I’ve been looking too hard, I’ve waiting too long
Sometimes I don’t know what I will find
I only know it’s a matter of time
When you love someone… When you love someone…
It feels so right, so warm and true, I need to know if you feel it too
(Aaah-aaah) maybe I’m wrong
(Aaah-aaah) won’t you tell me if I’m coming on too strong?
(Aaah-aaah) this heart of mine has been hurt before
(Aaah-aaah) this time I wanna be sure
I’ve been waiting, for a girl like you
(Ooh-ooh-ooh) to come into my life (life)
I’ve been waiting, for a girl like you
(Waiting for a girl) and a love that will survive

Hi if I asked you on a date,would you accept?”

(And the worst of all…)

“u have been on here forever, i dont think any mother could love you :)”

I sent a response back to that last one asking if he thought before he sent anything. I tried to be polite about it, but when a girl gets a comment like that, it’s a little difficult to try to be nice and diplomatic. Like the happy face at the end is suppose to make me feel better about the preceeding comment?

So please, please, whoever you are, think a little bit before you hit “send”. You’ll be doing us all a favour.

Clearing the Air

It seems to me that there are some serious misconceptions about who and what a Christian woman is. I’d like to make some clarifications.

Myth 1: A Christian woman belongs in the home, not in the workforce.
Truth: According to Proverbs 31:16, “She goes out to inspect a field and buys it; with her earnings she plants a vineyard.” That doesn’t sound like a housewife to me.

Myth 2: A Christian woman shouldn’t/can’t do manual labour. That’s a man’s job.
Truth: Yes, a man should work (this is also a biblical principle), but a woman can, too. “She is energetic and strong, a hard worker.” (Proverbs 31:17)

Myth 3: A Christian woman should seen and not heard.
Truth: “When she speaks, her words are wise.” (Proverbs 31:26)

Myth 4: A Christian woman should just go about her work. It’s her job, she doesn’t need to be thanked for it.
Truth: “Reward her for all she has done.” (Proverbs 31:31)

Myth 5: A Christian woman should be meek and mild.
Truth: In Ruth 3, Naomi instructs her daughter-in-law on how to win over Boaz. It’s not a meek and mild woman that would go to a man and risk defaming not only herself, but him as well. Both women acted out of boldness.

Myth 6: Christian women are prudes.
Truth: Just because some of us have made the choice to abstain from sex until marriage doesn’t mean we aren’t human. Horomones rage no matter what choice you’ve made. It’s our response to those urges that makes us different. “I am my lover’s, the one he desires. Come, my love, let us go out into the fields and spend the night among the wildflowers… And there I will give you my love.” (Song of Songs 7:10-12) That doesn’t sound like a prude to me. However, Song of Songs also says in 8:4, “I want you to promise, O women of Jerusalem, not to awaken love until the time is right.”

I know that there are a lot more ideas out there of what a Christian woman should be. Just because people think we should be a certain way doesn’t mean we are. Don’t be surprised when we aren’t.

Lost the Catch

I thought I had a good one on my line when a gentleman sent me a message last week. He could write and spell and even appeared to have read my profile. I responded (not right away – didn’t want to appear too eager), but he hasn’t written back.

But that’s okay, someone who is “looking for a woman with class” but posts photos of himself with skanks wants to meet me…

Where have all the real men gone?

Chivalry is nearly dead and it’s women who’ve killed it.  At least that’s what I’ve concluded.  How did I come to that conclusion, you may ask? Let me tell you.

Women these days are all about women’s rights and equality.  “We’re just as good as men are, if not better!”  Sure, I’m just as smart as the guy in the desk next to me, but while some women are all gung ho to take on men’s tasks, they’ve ruined men for the rest of us.

Just because one women would rather spend time in and auto shop rather than a beauty shop doesn’t mean every woman feels the same way.  I’d change the oil on my car if I had to, but so long as there’s a man around to do it, why should I have to?  Yes, I can open a door for myself, but if there’s a man around, I shouldn’t have to.  I can start a conversation, but what happened to men making the first move?

Here’s my issue:  I can send a communication to any number of guys and they may or may not respond, but I’m a little traditional and I’d rather be pursued rather than be the one having to make all the moves.  I’m a woman and I want to feel like one!  I dare you to try.

Here I am men, come and get me!