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Before clicking “send”…

Before you click the send button, please put just a little bit of thought into what you have to say. Is it worthwhile? Is it going to get a response (provided you’re looking for a response and I assume you are since you’re also on Plenty of Fish)? Is it well thought out? How will this be received? Would I want to get a message like this?

These few simple questions could have dramatically positive effects on how people respond to you.

Of the last few messages I’ve received on PoF, here’s what I’ve seen (word for word):

“Hi” (x2)

“How are you doing tonight?”

“hello there, how are you doing today besides looking so beautiful?”

(Here’s one of my favourites)

“So long, I’ve been looking too hard, I’ve waiting too long
Sometimes I don’t know what I will find
I only know it’s a matter of time
When you love someone… When you love someone…
It feels so right, so warm and true, I need to know if you feel it too
(Aaah-aaah) maybe I’m wrong
(Aaah-aaah) won’t you tell me if I’m coming on too strong?
(Aaah-aaah) this heart of mine has been hurt before
(Aaah-aaah) this time I wanna be sure
I’ve been waiting, for a girl like you
(Ooh-ooh-ooh) to come into my life (life)
I’ve been waiting, for a girl like you
(Waiting for a girl) and a love that will survive

Hi if I asked you on a date,would you accept?”

(And the worst of all…)

“u have been on here forever, i dont think any mother could love you :)”

I sent a response back to that last one asking if he thought before he sent anything. I tried to be polite about it, but when a girl gets a comment like that, it’s a little difficult to try to be nice and diplomatic. Like the happy face at the end is suppose to make me feel better about the preceeding comment?

So please, please, whoever you are, think a little bit before you hit “send”. You’ll be doing us all a favour.

U R PriT

First of all, look down.  See that thing on the desk in front of you with a bunch of letters on it?  Yeah, that’s a keyboard and, believe it or not, it’s got ALL the letters of the alphabet!  And, get this, those buttons actually work!  Yes, my friend, those little keys unlock the entire English language, but apparently your brain does not.

I can see by your profile that you have a post-secondary education, but I think you’re lying.  Or maybe you’re not, but I highly doubt that you made top grades in English.  (Hint: if you’re trying to convince someone that you are intelligent, you need to learn to type, and spell.  A bit of proper grammar would go a long way, too.)

Here are some possible conclusions:  a) you’re a moron b) you’re a rocket scientist, but don’t want me to feel inferior to your outrageous intelligence c) you’re a big, fat liar.  No matter what you are, I’m not likely to respond to your profile or any message you may send me.  I don’t go for morons, liars or those who dumb down their intelligence (though if you start spewing words that are too long to fit on one line, I’ll most likely tune out).

Call me old school, but I refuse to learn texting shorthand just to score a date.