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Category Archives: Canada

Faith or Function

I’ve been struggling this week. Not that my life is so difficult. I’m busy, but it’s not all that bad. Since starting school again, I’ve been faced with a world I thought I’d left behind. The school environment being part of it and widely liberal thinking being the other.

We Canadians are coming up to an election. This is an important event for us. I heard recently that there are approximately 3 million people between the ages of 18 and 25 that are eligable to vote. Most of them are not being targeted and encouraged to take action and vote. I’m glad.

All around campus I’ve been hearing things that make my heart hurt. Young people railing against our current government. People saying we need change. People who aren’t happy with the direction Mr Harper has been taking us. I’m glad that most of these people don’t seem to care quite enough to vote.

Perhaps it is because I was born and raised in the church that makes me a strong supporter of conservative government, but that doesn’t really matter now. I’m old enough to make my own choices and I still choose to support the Conservatives. When I got a phone call from the party asking if they could count on my support, it was a resounding YES! I don’t want to imagine a Canada with leaders who don’t care about the morality of our nation.

All of that being said, I find myself surrounded by people who do not share my political views. In fact, it is quite the opposite. Morals are lost and faith is no where to be found. When people push the envelope, it’s not in the direction of truth, but lies. This is where my struggle is.

I am endevouring to enter an industry where faith-based work is frowned upon. The question that came to me this week was this: if one can lie by omission, is to omit my faith from my work to deny it? Would I be denying my Lord and Saviour if I give in to those who say I cannot be successful if I include my faith in what I do? I know I am not alone in my struggle. And when asked the question of why not, an instructor was left nearly speechless. She had no exact response.

What is it about the world that sees rage against faith as edgy, modern and stylish, but anything promoting faith and morals has become archaic and even offensive?

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Where oh where has my little life gone?

Sometimes it seems like just days ago. Sometimes it feels like decades ago. In reality, it was somewhere in the middle. Though my life has never been one to be considered dull or bland, I start to wonder where it all went.

I’ve been back in Canada for a little over a week. I didn’t even have the comfortable luxury of taking a break to realign myself with our fair culture. In a mere 18 hours, I made the jump from a hot climate and culture, to a cool climate and culture. (After a month in the Amazon, even Vancouver’s record mild winter felt like an Arctic ice storm to me.) I miss Peru more than words can say. It’s a different life down there. I live the South American version of my life. People who have seen me live both lives know that there is a Peruvian Jordan and there is a Canadian Jordan. I’d like to be both all the time, but I don’t see how that is possible.

For someone who has never fallen in love with the jungle, let alone a third world country, the concept seems odd and foreign. It leaves a residue in the minds of the well-cultured. The concept of giving up a life in the land of opportunity seems misguided at best. Even for those who know me, the concept is difficult to grasp.

I am torn between two worlds. One part of me resides in the land where I was born and raised and love with a passion I cannot describe. The other part in a land I never expected to love, but cannot imagine my life without.

I have no great words of wisdom on how to reconcile these two parts and I am not sure that they even create a whole. There was a day when I thought I knew exactly where I was going and what I wanted and now… I want to go so many places, I want so many things. I wonder if I could have done more or if I could be doing more now. I wonder if I am where I should be or if I’ve missed the mark completely.

I know that I am not alone in these thoughts and feelings for there are many who share the concept of being torn between two lives. I know that there is an answer and I know that it must be sought.