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I’m sorry, did you say something?

So, I haven’t posted in a while and there are two reasons for that. 1 – I’ve been crazy busy finishing up my education. Had my last day of class last week and by the end of next week I’ll be out there looking for work! 2 – I think the pond has run dry. All that drought in the States has caught up to Plenty of Fish and there ain’t much for good fishin’ these days.

I was perusing some profiles today to see if anything good had popped up in my absence. Nothing. Zip. Zilch. Nada. Then, my phone buzzed! I had a new email! There was a new message waiting for me on Plenty of Fish!

“f&@#ng in the indian clothes 😉 sexyyy” (insert confused silence)

This message was then followed up by “?”.

I don’t understand. Was I supposed to respond to that? In what land should a girl be expected to respond to that? Never in “real life” would I respond to a guy swearing at me as an introduction. Why should it be any different online?

That’s all I have to say about that.

The Vision of Love

I was listening to Kris Allen’s new album the other day (which I immediately labelled my summer album after listening to the first 3 songs) and one song goes like this:

Make-up hides her face
‘Cause she feels out of place
She cries
Come on someone tell this girl she’s beautiful

I admit that I’ve been this girl on many occasions. I’ve seen this girl more times than I care to count. Sometimes she’s the girl sitting in the corner of the coffee shop. Sometimes she’s sitting waiting for the bus. Sometimes she’s walking down the street with her head down and sometimes no one ever sees her.

I’ve seen unfeeling young men mock her and though she often hides it well, I have felt her shame. I’ve seen the “cool” girls snub her and I have felt her pain. No matter how hard she tries, nothing seems to change. And the truth is, she’s not the one who needs to change. She’s beautiful just the way she is. And, if someone would look past her glasses or braces or out-of-date clothes or few extra pounds they would see that too. 

I’m tired of guys who make no apologies for not wanting messages from “fatties”. I’m tired of guys who let the door slam in the face of the shy girl. I’m tired of young men treating young women like they don’t matter. 

I wish that I could find every young woman like myself and help her to see that her value is not in how other people see her, but in how she sees herself. The way people treat her does not define who she is. She is beautiful just the way she is and one day, someone will realise just how much they’ve missed by letting her fade into the background, she will shine far brighter than those who spent all their time ignoring her.

Not A Chance (Dirty Filthy Pervert Part III)

So if you got a message from a cute guy, would you answer?

If you got a message from a “really cute guy who had been just girl deprived for months working up north would you maybe help him out and trade a couple body pics with him?”

Again, I just have to wonder, at what point in humanity’s evolution did a proposition like this become appropriate or socially acceptable? And who are the girls that actually say yes to encourage guys like this to keep making propositions like this?

Ladies, here’s a hint, if you don’t want to be treated like a piece of meat, don’t act like one! When you go out dressed like you walk the streets at night for a living, you can’t be surprised if you get cat calls and whistles and really, you have no right to get mad,either. What you’re doing it making it worse for the rest of us girls who actually value who and what we are by letting men get away with crude, rude behaviour.

To Mr. deal2233, my response to his proposition was “not a chance”. I’m sorry. No, I’m not sorry. I’m worth way more than a couple of dirty pictures just so you can deal with your deprivation (there’s another post waiting there).

Gee, I hope it wasn’t me…

I’ve had my profile up on Plenty of Fish longer than I’d like to admit. Actually, I don’t even know how long I’ve had a Plenty of Fish profile. Too long if I can’t even remember. But there are those who are not lifetime members and actually delete their profile when the site has come to the end of its usefulness. 

Several of those people happened to have messaged me recently. I noticed as I was filtering through my inbox today. Seeing more than one deleted profile there makes me hope I’m not the common denominator there.

On a side note, that guy that sent me that fabulous message yesterday morning has sent me several since. Apparently it was not a joke and he was quite serious (insert blush here).

What Every Girl Should Wake Up To

There are some things that every girl deserves, married or single, short or tall, big or small.

This morning I had a message in my Plenty of Fish inbox:

“Sometimes you open your eyes and see pure beauty, and you don’t know what to say. That’s what’s happening right now for me.”

Wouldn’t it be great if every girl everywhere could wake up to that?

Burn Before Reading

Image

If my computer were paper-based, I think I’d be burning a lot of messages before I ever read them. For those of you who are familiar with the online dating scene, you may understand what I mean.

I never read a message before I’ve viewed the profile of the sender and, sometimes, I don’t want to read the message after viewing the profile of the sender. Let me show you some examples:

I got a message from changes604 today. The picture that shows up as his primary photo is so grainy it’s difficult to tell if he’s even human or not. The only other photo he has on his profile is even worse than the oh-so-popular bathroom/iPhone photo. It’s a photo of a photo on a phone. My question is, if the photo is already on a cellular device, why did he need to take a picture of it on the device. Could it not have just been emailed? Anyway…

Aside from the photos, changes604 is a 27 year old labourer with no post-secondary education. I’m particular about whom I communicate with. Not that I have anything against labourers – society needs them – but just because you work hard for a living, doesn’t mean you can’t take the time to use some spelling and grammar. The first line or changes604’s profile goes a little something like this:

“Hey Everyone MY name is Robert :D” It only gets worse from there. He uses a double period (..) to end what I believe to be sentences and doesn’t use another capital letter until the very last word – “Peom”. Aw, he wrote a peom. If only I knew what a peom was! changes604 frosts his profile with a bang: “I HAVE FACEBOOK ALSO IF U WANA ADD ME ALSO LOVE TEXTING REMEMBER AGE IS ONLY A NUMBER”.

And then I made the mistake of reading the message. (Oh that I could have burned it before reading!) “heyh ow are u” You know when you blow up a balloon and are just about to tie the knot and it just flies out of your hand? That sound played in my head when I read this message. But it didn’t stop there! Oh no! When I failed to respond, he sent another – “we soudl hang”. I told him I didn’t know what “soudl” was and wasn’t sure I wanted to be involved with it. He then asked me to go see a movie with him. Followed by, “how u like my page” and “would u like my facebook”.

As politely as I could (which probably didn’t come across at all friendly) I told him that he might want to read my entire profile and that I wasn’t in the habit of dating people who had an aversion to spelling, grammar, capital letters and punctuation.

He didn’t respond again.

 

Hey, ‘sup.

Most girls don’t respond to “hey, ‘sup” in person so why do some men think they will online? It sounds (looks) even worse typed out than it does out loud. Stan500 tried this one on me this week. I hope by now you’d know me well enough to know that he did not receive a response. The obvious lack of time in sending the message does not merit me wasting my time responding.

In addition to “hey sup”, I’ve also had, “Hey beauty,how are u?”, “Hi”, and a “How are you doing tonight?” from Cat_Man_Dan. (That name alone was enough for me to avoid responding – I’m allergic to cats).

The best one was “still interested…in more?” I asked about that one. Apparently some guy (who didn’t even appear all that bad) let his buddy use his PC (and his Plenty of Fish account) and that message ensued. I was almost disappointed that he didn’t communicate on purpose. One of the first interesting guys I get a message from lately and he wasn’t even the one who sent it!

Here’s to hoping that one of these days someone will try something worth responding to.