I’m sorry, did you say something?

So, I haven’t posted in a while and there are two reasons for that. 1 – I’ve been crazy busy finishing up my education. Had my last day of class last week and by the end of next week I’ll be out there looking for work! 2 – I think the pond has run dry. All that drought in the States has caught up to Plenty of Fish and there ain’t much for good fishin’ these days.

I was perusing some profiles today to see if anything good had popped up in my absence. Nothing. Zip. Zilch. Nada. Then, my phone buzzed! I had a new email! There was a new message waiting for me on Plenty of Fish!

“f&@#ng in the indian clothes 😉 sexyyy” (insert confused silence)

This message was then followed up by “?”.

I don’t understand. Was I supposed to respond to that? In what land should a girl be expected to respond to that? Never in “real life” would I respond to a guy swearing at me as an introduction. Why should it be any different online?

That’s all I have to say about that.

Before clicking “send”…

Before you click the send button, please put just a little bit of thought into what you have to say. Is it worthwhile? Is it going to get a response (provided you’re looking for a response and I assume you are since you’re also on Plenty of Fish)? Is it well thought out? How will this be received? Would I want to get a message like this?

These few simple questions could have dramatically positive effects on how people respond to you.

Of the last few messages I’ve received on PoF, here’s what I’ve seen (word for word):

“Hi” (x2)

“How are you doing tonight?”

“hello there, how are you doing today besides looking so beautiful?”

(Here’s one of my favourites)

“So long, I’ve been looking too hard, I’ve waiting too long
Sometimes I don’t know what I will find
I only know it’s a matter of time
When you love someone… When you love someone…
It feels so right, so warm and true, I need to know if you feel it too
(Aaah-aaah) maybe I’m wrong
(Aaah-aaah) won’t you tell me if I’m coming on too strong?
(Aaah-aaah) this heart of mine has been hurt before
(Aaah-aaah) this time I wanna be sure
I’ve been waiting, for a girl like you
(Ooh-ooh-ooh) to come into my life (life)
I’ve been waiting, for a girl like you
(Waiting for a girl) and a love that will survive

Hi if I asked you on a date,would you accept?”

(And the worst of all…)

“u have been on here forever, i dont think any mother could love you :)”

I sent a response back to that last one asking if he thought before he sent anything. I tried to be polite about it, but when a girl gets a comment like that, it’s a little difficult to try to be nice and diplomatic. Like the happy face at the end is suppose to make me feel better about the preceeding comment?

So please, please, whoever you are, think a little bit before you hit “send”. You’ll be doing us all a favour.

Opposites Are Attracted To Me

I had two very different Plenty of Fish experiences in as many days.

The first was yesterday. I may or may not have been online while at work and suddenly a message pops up on Plenty of Fish. Someone wanted to chat with me! Usually I click “decline” simply because of past experiences. This time, I clicked “accept”. It turned out to be alrigh. Not that I’d ever date this guy or anything, but he was a nice Indian guy who seemed floored that I adore Indian movies as much as he does. He spent the better part of a half an hour trying to convince me to go see a movie with him next weekend. Just so happens, I’ve been thinking about going to see the movie over Christmas break. As a white chick, it’s pretty difficult to find movie dates when the movie you want to see is in Hindi with English subtitles.

I was impressed that this guy just chatted with me for the afternoon. No disgusting suggestions or off-colour comments, just questions and answers. Refreshing, really.

The second experience just goes to show that a girl can’t keep her hopes up. Another instant message box popped up today. “Hey, wanna hump?” I’m still baffled that some people think that this is an appropriate introduction to a conversation. No, thank you, I don’t want to hump. Close. Delete. Block.

Pinky, are you pondering what I’m pondering?

“I think so, Brain, but what if the hippopotamus won’t wear the beach thong?”

If you see a dude in a hot pink satin shirt, sitting beside a pink purse and holding a camera in a pink case, what would you think? Seriously. True story.

I really didn’t need to know that…

A couple of weeks ago my phone bleeped with a new email. I had a new message from Plenty of Fish! I got to the nearest computer to see what sort of winner found my profile…

“I just farted really loud and HAD to tell someone.”

So glad you thought of me. Thanks.

A Little Clarification

It seems that I have more readers than I thought (this is based on the number of comments I’ve recently received) and they are as opinionated as I am! I’m all for sharing opinions as long as it stays nice and doesn’t get nasty. For readers new to LMV, I feel I should clarify a few things:

Just because I have a Plenty of Fish profile does not mean I expect to meet that special someone on Plenty of Fish. The fact that I’ve even come across a few seemingly decent men is an absolute surprise to me. I’d rather meet a good man the old-fashioned way – at church.

I realise I have a different set of standards than most people. I strongly believe that Christians are called to something higher than the rest of the world. I abstain as much as possible from certain things (I don’t drink – ever, I don’t do drugs, as the title of this blog would imply, I’m a virgin, I don’t smoke, I don’t swear). These are all things I find unbecoming to Christians. We will never win the world if we act exactly like the world. God called us to be set apart – I intend to live that life.

Despite these strong opinions, I’m not a prude. I like to have fun as much as the next person, but fun doesn’t have to include alcohol, clubs or bars. I like going to pubs (their food is just so good!) on occasion, but I don’t make a habit of it.

I don’t think it’s too much to ask that a man live up to these standards. I’ve met them. They do exist. So, rather than lower my standards, I’ll keep waiting (just like I have been for 28 years).

Response to a Reader

I recently received the following comment on my post “Apparent Christianity” from an anonymous reader:

I listed myself as a Christian on my POF profile. I am a Christian, I believe in God and I accept Jesus as the son of God yes. But I don’t live an incredibly Christian lifestyle Jordan. I am not a virgin, I support Gay rights, I am pro choice. I don’t think it is fair of you to judge some one who says they are Christian vs. their hobbies and interests….

Love from, Successful POF User

To Successful POF User:

First of all, this blog is entirely my own opinion. I understand that many of my views are considered old-fashioned and, in many cases, socially unacceptable. While I don’t live a perfect life, by giving myself a label of “Christian”, I try to live a life worthy of the name and the call God has placed on my life. To be a Christian is to be Christ-like – promoting what He promotes and avoiding what He avoids. To live a life according to biblical principles is to live a life of abstinence before marriage, to promote life (at all stages – from conception to death) and to promote the sanctity of marriage (and romantic relationships).

Let’s also remember that my “judgement” of these men is based entirely upon whether or not I think they are marriageable material – for me, no one else. I will not marry a man who spends his weekends drinking at the pub. I will not marry a man who thinks it’s okay for two men or two women to marry. I will not marry a man who believes it is a woman’s choice whether or not to kill her unborn child. These are standards I’ve set for myself and I do not expect that everyone will conform to them.

It is my opinion that, if someone gives them self the label of “Christian” that they should do everything in their power (with the help of God) to live a life worthy of that call. The world is lost because too many Christians are themselves lost. If a Christian is no different from the world, what is there to draw the unbelievers to the knowledge of Christ?